Sunday, December 11, 2005

25 signs that you have grown up

  • 1. Your house plants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.
  • 2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.
  • 3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
  • 4. 6:00AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
  • 5. You hear your favorite song in an elevator.
  • 6. You watch the Weather Channel.
  • 7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and "break up."
  • 8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.
  • 9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."
  • 10. You're the one calling the police because those %&@# kids next door won't turn down the stereo.
  • 11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
  • 12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
  • 13. Your car insurance goes down, and your car payments go up.
  • 14. You feed your dog Science Diet, instead of McDonald's leftovers.
  • 15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
  • 16. You take naps sometimes between noon and 6 PM.
  • 17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.
  • 18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.
  • 19. If you're female, you go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.
  • 20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good stuff."
  • 21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
  • 22. "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces "I'm never going to drink that much again."
  • 23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
  • 24. You drink at home to save money before going to a bar.
  • 25. You read this entire list,looking desperately for one sign that doesn't apply to you and can't find one to save your sorry OLD butt.

Thanks Ronnie

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