Saturday, August 20, 2005

Everybody can't be a winner

Uglygirls

via Dave’s Daily

Bats & Pieces .... of Bats

Baseball bat

Take me out to the ball game....

Take me out to the crowd….

Fly me to some peanuts and Cracker Jacks….

I don’t care if I’m just half a bat….

Oh it’s scoot, scoot, scoot for the ball fans….

If they get hit it’s a shame….

For it’s one….two… three fans knocked out…..

at the old ball game.

 

Making a night deposit at the ATM

Night deposit

via Dave’s Daily

I hate people who protest protesters

Protesting

via Dave’s Daily

A pig with 2 snouts

2snouterd pig

Jets over Busch Stadium

Jets over BuschStadium
Overhead shot of two fighter jets flying over Busch Stadium in St. Louis MO.  You can see the new Busch Stadium under construction right next to the current stadium.   This picture must have been taken around June of 2005 because the seats in the new ballpark are pretty much installed as of now (August 2005). The old Busch Stadium will be imploded at the end of the season after the Cardinals win the World Series.  Thew new stadium will be completed before opening day 2006.

 My photos of new Busch Stadium can be found here.

Thanks Deadeye

Baby hedgehogs

 Porcupine-babyA hedgehog is any of a wide variety of small quilled mammals of the order Insectivora found through parts of Europe, Asia, Africa, and New Zealand. There are no hedgehogs native to The Americas.

Hedgehogs are easily distinguished by their quills, which are hollow hairs made stiff with keratin. Their quills are not poisonous or barbed and, unlike the quills of a porcupine, cannot easily be removed from the animal.

 

Fishtank platform shoes

Platshoefishw 
These shoes feature a white vinyl synthetic leather platform and shoe upper and a water-filled clear plastic heel with two gold fish.  $58 at  Caboots.

via Look at this

World's lightest indoor remote controlled airplane

Butterfly plane
Fly it in your livingroom during commercial breaks.  Butterfly Livingroom Flyer.  Only $239 complete.

via New links

British soldiers get germ fighting underwear

Germ underwear LONDON - British troops combating the heat and dust of  Iraq Afghanistan have a new weapon in their armory — germ-fighting underwear. The antimicrobial underpants have been introduced by the Ministry of Defense as part of a new desert uniform for soldiers. They are the first undergarments issued to British troops, who traditionally have had to supply their own.

Military officials said Thursday the unisex trunks were made from artificial fibers for comfort, with silver particles woven into the material to prevent sweating.

"It is coated to prevent bacterial infection, and we have tried to arrange the seams so that they don't chafe," Col. Silas Suchanek, who led the team that procured the new equipment, said Thursday.  Complete Story on Yahoo! News.

via New links

Firefly - the mobile phone for mobile kids

Firefly phoneThe fun glowing phone designed from a kids point of view.  With just 5 keys, Firefly phones keep kids connected with the people who matter most… Mom and Dad.  With lights, sounds, colors and animation, Firefly phones keep it fun.

The phone has two buttons for quick access to Mom and Dad.  The phone can hold up to 20 additional phone numbers in its address book.  There’s also a button on the side for emergencies only.

 They’re only $99.99 plus air time, which can be purchased in $25, $50 and $75 packages.  no info on how many minutes you get for these packages.

Seems pretty expensive to me.  Firefly phones.

via kottle

Friday, August 19, 2005

Wrinklefree horsepants

Horsepants

From The Toilet via Look at This

Windows XP tips and tricks

The long list includes:

And many, many more Windows XP tips and tricks.

via Look at this

 

Another big ole fish

Big fish2

Who's got the hairiest back?

Minor league team to host the hairiest back contest

HairyBack WOODBRIDGE, Va. -- The Potomac Nationals of the Carolina League are ready to let the fur fly later this month.

The Class-A affiliate of the Washington Nationals will hold its first-ever "Hairiest Back at the Ballpark" contest before their game against a team from Salem, Va., on Aug. 25.

According to the team's press release, the winner will receive a complimentary laser hair removal service valued at $2,500.

In addition, there will be a drawing for a complimentary laser removal service worth $1,200 for those fans who do not want to participate in the contest.

via Madville

Literal answers to rhetorical questions

Questions like:

  • What’s up Doc?
  • Where have all the flowers gone?
  • How do I love thee?  Let me count the ways.
  • How long has this been going on?
  • How high is the moon?

Clik here for the answers to these and other rhetorical questions.

via Madville

Cops test fire 700 rounds in New Orleans neighborhood - No one calls police

Cop shoots Murder rates have fallen dramatically in many major U.S. cities -- but that's not happening in the Big Easy.

Although the murder rate in New Orleans is lower than it was a decade ago, it's rising and is nearly 10 times the national average.

A criminologist said the city's trend is the reverse of 46 of the top 50 cities in the United States.

Experts said the trend in the city that's home to the popular French Quarter exists for several reasons -- drugs, too few police, inexperienced prosecutors, and residents staying quiet because they fear retaliation.

They point to an experiment last year by university researchers in which police fired 700 blank rounds in a New Orleans neighborhood in a single afternoon.

No one called police to report the gunfire.

via Madville.com

That takes care of that

Evening Whirl
Headline from a recent issue of the Evening Whirl, a ghetto newspaper in St. louis.

World's tallest buildings

Tallest buildings

Click Skyscraper Page for details.

via New Links

Michael Jackson has detachable nose

Michael-Jackson-Has-A-Detachable-Nose-2 A juror from Michael Jackson trial claims the pop star has a detachable nose. Ray Hultman, 62, wrote in his upcoming book, "The Deliberator", that he was shocked when he first saw Michael, saying the singer looks like a "mummy with nostril holes" and that he has a detachable nose.

According New York Post newspaper, Hultman wrote: "Up close, his appearance is amazing. He wears a black pageboy wig and his face is caked

in white make-up, which hides the prosthesis that serves as the tip of his nose.
 
Read more here.
 

Thursday, August 18, 2005

Plane hit by lightning

Plane_lightninggif

There are more pics and a movie here.

via Land-o-links

Uh, what's wrong with this picture?

Back_titties

What friends are for

Monkey friends

Oops

Toupe

I don't think they're dancin

Doggie foursome

via Bad Gas

Brown can snooze for you

UPS Siesta

via Wugsy

Got a dirty monitor?

Cleaner

Click here to get it cleaned automatically.

via Wugsy

The unedited 911 audio tapes

911Tapes.320w

From MSNBC

via Blogywood

Really cool Discovery launch photos

Discovery launch
STS-114 Discovery RTF – July 26, 2005 10:38 am EST

see a collection of launch photos here.

Why women live longer than men

There’s a group of photos that show you why women live longer than men.

Here’s just one.
Ladder man

via new links

A good hockey player but not a camera lover

Fukufuji TOKYO - Yutaka Fukufuji is ready to ride the buses in hockey's backwaters a few more years if that's what it takes to make the NHL. The Japanese goaltender signed a two-year contract with the Los Angeles Kings this month and will attend a rookie camp next month.

Read the story.

via new links

They deserve each other

Freakylove

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

The tomato garden

An old Italian man lived alone in the country.
He wanted to dig his tomato garden, but it was very hard work as the ground was hard.
His only son, Vincent, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament.

Dear Vincent,

I am feeling pretty bad because it looks like I won't be able to plant my tomato garden this year.   I'm just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. If you were here my troubles would be over.   I know you would dig the plot for me.

Love Dad

 

A few days later he received a letter from his son.

 

Dear Dad,
Not for nothing, but don't dig up that garden. That's where I buried the BODIES.

Love Vinnie

 

At 4 a.m. the next morning,  FBI agents and local police arrived and dug  up the entire area without finding any bodies.   They apologized to the old man and left.

 

That same day the old man received another letter from his son.

 

Dear Dad,

Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now. That's the best I could do under the circumstances.

Love Vinnie

Thanks Mary

A man staggered home late after another evening with his drinking buddies....

… S hoes in left hand to avoid waking his wife, he tiptoed as quietly as he could  toward the stairs leading to their upstairs bedroom, but misjudged the bottom step in the darkened entryway.
As he caught himself by grabbing the banister, his body swung around and he landed heavily on his rump.
A whiskey bottle in each back pocket broke and made the landing especially painful. Managing to suppress a yelp, the man sprung up, He pulled down his pants, and examined his lacerated and bleeding cheeks in the mirror of the nearby darkened hallway.
He managed to find a large full box of Band-Aids and proceeded to place a patch as best he could on each place he saw blood.  After hiding the now empty box, he managed to shuffle and stumble his way to bed.

In the morning, the man awoke with searing pain in his head and butt and his wife staring at him from across the room.  
She said, "You were drunk again last night."
Forcing himself to ignore his agony, he looked meekly at her and replied, "Now, hon, why would you say such a mean thing?"
"Well," she said, " it could be the open front door, it could be the glass and whiskey at the bottom of the stairs, it could be the drops of blood trailing through the house, it could be your bloodshot eyes,but, mostly.... it's all those Band-Aids stuck on the downstairs mirror!"

Thanks Cousin Phyllis

Take a whiz or make a call... heck, do both at the same time

Urine powered batteries developed for your cell phone

 Physicists in Singapore have succeeded in creating the first paper battery that generates electricity from urine. This new battery will be the perfect power source for cheap, disposable healthcare test-kits for diseases such as diabetes, and could even be used in emergency situations to power a cell phone.

Read all about it.

via hackaday

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

A very unusual obituary

The News and Observer of Raleigh North Carolina ran this obituary recently.  

Here are a few lines from the obit:

 On June 3, 2005 at 10:45 p.m. in Memphis, Tennessee, Dorothy Gibson Cully, 86, died peacefully, while in the loving care of her two favorite children, Barbara and David. All of her breath leaked out.

….. he ultimately stuck his head in a heated gas oven with a golden delicious apple propped in his mouth. Miraculously, the apple was saved for the evening dessert. Calvin was not.

 At the time of her death, Dot was visiting her daughter, Carol in Memphis. Carol and her husband, Ron, away from home attending a "very important conference" at a posh Florida resort, rushed home 10 days later after learning of the death.

 Dot graduated from Eastern High School at 15, worked in Baltimore full time from 1934 to 1979, beginning as a factory worker at Cross & Blackwell and retiring after 30 years as property manager and controller for a Baltimore conglomerate, Housing Engineering Company, all while raising four children, two of who are fairly normal.

 Opinions about the details of this obit are not, since Mom would have liked it this way.

 It’s worth reading in it’s entirity.

via Bifurcated Rivets

Where company names originated

SAP: "Systems, Applications, Products in Data Processing", formed by four ex-IBM employees who used to work in the 'Systems/Applications/Projects' group of IBM.

SONY: From the Latin word 'sonus' meaning sound, and 'sonny' a slang used by Americans to refer to a bright youngster.

Yahoo!: The word was invented by Jonathan Swift and used in his book Gulliver's Travels. It represents a person who is repulsive in appearance and action and is barely human. Yahoo! founders Jerry Yang and David Filo selected the name because they considered themselves yahoos.

Motorola: Founder Paul Galvin came up with this name when his company started manufacturing radios for cars. The popular radio company at the time was called Victrola.

Microsoft: It was coined by Bill Gates to represent the company that was devoted to MICROcomputer SOFTware. Originally christened Micro-Soft, the '-' was removed later on.

Hewlwtt-Packard: Bill Hewlett and Dave Packard tossed a coin to decide whether the company they founded would be called Hewlett-Packard or Packard-Hewlett.

Google: The name started as a jockey boast about the amount of information the search-engine would be able to search. It was originally named 'Googol', a word for the number represented by 1 followed by 100 zeros. After founders - Stanford graduate students Sergey Brin and Larry Page presented their project to an angel investor, they received a cheque made out to 'Google.

Apple Computers: Favourite fruit of founder Steve Jobs. He was three months late in filing a name for the business, and he threatened to call his company Apple Computers if the other colleagues didn't suggest a better name by 5 o'clock.

Adobe: The name came from the river Adobe Creek that ran behind the house of founder John Warnock.

A few more can be found here.

via The Presurfer

Monday, August 15, 2005

A long way from Tupelo

Extreme elvis
Extreme Elvis   YIKES!

via Bifurcated Rivets

Useless skills

You can learn a lot of time wasting skills here.  For instance:

  • How to twirl a pen
  • Easy air guitar – Volume I
  • One handed card shuffling
  • Guide to balloons and ballooning

Plus much, much more.  Click here to get edjumakated.

via Bifurcated Rivets

The Gross-Out Quiz

Afew questions from the quiz:

 In a single year, how many descendents can a pair of rats produce?

Approximately how much dung does an adult elephant produce each day?

 The regal horned lizard isn't too big, but it repels predators in short order with what gross behavior?
 
Take the quiz here.
 
via The Presurfer

Mom was right, you can go blind

 Researchers have finally found evidence for what good Catholic boys have known all along – erotic images make you go blind. The effect is temporary and lasts just a moment, but the research has added to road-safety campaigners’ calls to ban sexy billboard-advertising near busy roads, in the hope of preventing accidents. 

The new study by US psychologists found that people shown erotic or gory images frequently fail to process images they see immediately afterwards. And the researchers say some personality types appear to be affected more than others by the phenomenon, known as “emotion-induced blindness”.

Here’s the whole story.

via The Presurfer

Dictionary of Prison slang

Here are a few examples of prison slang:

 CHALK: A crude wine made from yeast, sugar, rice or fruit and water.

 FALL: A> (from); The county the inmate was convicted in "Where did you fall from."

 FAT BACK: Meaning that a person has a big butt.

 KILL SHIELD: A garment worn by female officers, usually a long vest or jacket.

 PISTOLS: Leather work gloves with all of the fingers cut off of them.

More can be found here.

via J-Walk blog

 

For sale on eBay

This table was for sale on eBay.  How can you tell that this table was put up for bid by a man?
Look closely before you look at the answer below.

Ebay item

Look at the mirror in the picture.

Thanks Paul