Saturday, June 10, 2006

Jack the cat chases black bear up tree

Bear on a poleA black bear picked the wrong yard for a jaunt, running into a territorial tabby who ran the furry beast up a tree — twice.

Jack, a 15-pound orange and white cat, keeps a close vigil on his property, often chasing small animals, but his owners and neighbors say his latest escapade was surprising.

"We used to joke, 'Jack's on duty,' never knowing he'd go after a bear," owner Donna Dickey told The Star-Ledger of Newark for Friday's editions.

Neighbor Suzanne Giovanetti first spotted Jack's accomplishment after her husband saw a bear climb a tree on the edge of their northern New Jersey property on Sunday. Giovanetti thought Jack was simply looking up at the bear, but soon realized the much larger animal was afraid of the hissing cat.

After about 15 minutes, the bear descended and tried to run away, but Jack chased it up another tree.

Dickey, who feared for her cat, then called Jack home and the bear scurried back to the woods.

"He doesn't want anybody in his yard," Dickey said.

Bear sightings are not unusual in West Milford, which experts consider one of the state's most bear-populated areas



Create a frame with Zingfu


There are several frames you can use.  Just upload your picture and adjust the size and placement and Zingfu!

Try it.


A cat and his laptop

Cat laptopA cute video here.   I’m just glad it isn’t my laptop… or my cat either.


Best news I've heard in a loooong time

Eating pizza 'cuts cancer risk'

Italian researchers say eating pizza could protect against cancer.

PizzaResearchers claim eating pizza regularly reduced the risk of developing oesophageal cancer by 59%.

The risk of developing colon cancer also fell by 26% and mouth cancer by 34%, they claimed.

The secret could be lycopene, an antioxidant chemical in tomatoes, which is thought to offer some protection against cancer, and which gives the fruit its traditional red colour.

Read more


Laptop live

Laptop Live



Elephant drive-in theater

Elephant Drive-in Movie



My Favorite Chinese


Roggy roves rookies


The resemblance to Scooby Doo’s eyes are uncanny.


'Animal House' raided raid original 'Animal House' at Dartmouth

HANOVER, New Hampshire (AP) -- Authorities raided the Dartmouth College fraternity that helped inspire the movie "Animal House," carrying off 10 crates, a computer and other items.

BlutoInvestigators refused to say Friday what the search on the Ivy League campus was about.

Court documents on the raid were sealed, and Hanover police said only that the search at the Alpha Delta house was part of a two-year investigation and that they expect to make arrests. Alpha Delta members turned a reporter away at the door Friday.

Read the whole CNN story


Friday, June 09, 2006

The source of morning breath

Bad dreams

Is there a moron out there who doesn't know this?


If so, then he deserves what he gets.


Top 25 rejected movie roles

Here are a few:

The complete list


War and Peace Illusion

Peace war


The Not So Best Man

Best Man of the Week


Roughing it

Limo Camper


He needs to find God

Let’s hope it’s a clean God.
God sock


Where hangovers come from

DUII always thought the alcohol caused the headache.

Anybody got any spackle?

Funny DUI test.  (Funny to most people anyway.)


Feeling lucky?




Pi pie


See what your name looks like in Russian

This is pretty cool... click the link below. Ignore all the crazy Russian on the site, just type your name in the text box and click to see what  your name looks like in Russian...very impressive! (Type your first and last name.)

View Russian name

Thanks Phyllis

Buy Mom

Grocery cartA guy shopping in a supermarket noticed a little old lady following him around. If he stopped, she stopped. Furthermore she kept staring at him. She finally overtook him at the checkout, and she turned to him and said, "I hope I haven't made you feel ill at ease; it's just that you look so much like my late son."

 He answered, "That's okay."

"I know it's silly, but if you'd call out "Good bye, Mom" as I leave the store, it would make me feel so happy."

She then went through the checkout .... and as she was on her way out of the store, the man called out, "Goodbye, Mother."

The little old lady waved and smiled back at him.

Pleased that he had brought a little sunshine into someone's day, he went to pay for his groceries.

"That comes to $121.85," said the clerk.

"How come so much? I only bought 5 items.."

The clerk replied, "Yeah, but your Mother said you'd pay for her things, too."

Thanks Mickie

Strange bedfellows

Snake hamsterTOKYO -- Hamster named Gohan, right, and snake Aochan live togther in a cardboard box at Mutsugoro Okoku zoo, outskirts of Tokyo. Gohan and Aochan make strange bedfellows: one's a 9 centimeter dwarf hamster; the other is a 120 centimeter-long (yard-long) ratsnake. Zookeepers at Tokyo's Mutsugoro Okoku zoo presented the hamster - whose name means "meal" in Japanese - to Aochan as a tasty morsel in October, after the snake refused to eat frozen mice. But instead of indulging, Aochan decided to make friends with the furry rodent, according to keeper Kazuya Yamamoto. The pair have shared a cage since. (01/18/06 AP photo)


A slight emissions problem

Emission problemBELGRADE, Yugoslavia -- An explosion envelops the car of Serbian stuntman Zeljko Bozic as he jumps the car from a bridge into the Sava river, in Belgrade. Bozic was taken to the hospital in an unconscious condition after the jump, and his medical condition is unknown at this time. The stunt was performed to advertise packets of potato crisps.


Woman beaten with dead dog

Of course this had to happen in my area.

Chihuahua Cops: Breeder hit with dead Chihuahua
ST. PETERS, Missouri (AP) -- A woman angry that her new puppy had died pushed her way into a dog breeder's home and repeatedly hit her on the head with the dead Chihuahua, authorities said.

The 33-year-old woman told police she had taken the puppy to a veterinarian, who said it was only 4 weeks old and needed to be returned to its mother. But before she could return the puppy, it died.

Early Wednesday, the woman went to the breeder's home, pushed her way inside and began fighting with the breeder as she tried to make her way to the basement to get another puppy, police said.

The breeder wrestled the woman out of her house to the front porch, where the woman then hit the breeder over the head numerous times with the dead puppy, the St. Louis Post-Dispatch reported, citing police.

As the woman drove away, she waved the dead puppy out of the car's sunroof and yelled threats at the breeder, police said. She later called the breeder and threatened her and her family, according to court records.

Here’s the story at CNN


Poor Orange

Malaise_de_L__Orange_by_weemIf you can't tell what's going on, we follow our Orange friend as he comes home to find his girlfriend's "clothes" scattered around the floor. He then proceeds to catch her in bed with a handsome banana. After that, even his friends can't console him. He drowns his sorrows in nicotine and liquor.



How to get rid of stuffed or running nose without drugs


  1. Perform the below routine 3 times:
    1. Perform 10 pressures on a cavity at the corner of the nostrils (point 1). You should almost close and open the nostrils when you do the round movement.
    2. Perform 10 pressures on a cavity just below the corner of the eyes near the nose (point 2)
    3. Perform 10 pressures on a cavity just below the ear, behind the earlobe (point 3)
    4. Massage the earlobe 10 times (point 4)
  2. After performing the above 3 times, you should feel immediate relief of your nasal congestion. It is advised to return on the above procedure again in about 10 minutes to make it more permanent or the congestion could return.

Additional instructions: The pressures are actually round movement. Look at the pictures for exact motion.

Details and More info


Thursday, June 08, 2006

We're Experiencing Technical Difficulties - PLEASE STAND BY

Please stand byWe’re experiencing problems uploading posts, as you can probably tell by the duplicates. 

We were having some problems yesterday too. 

I believe the problem lies within  

We’ll try again in a little while.


100 greatest movie posters of all time

Best poster of all time SPLASH

Take a look


Pics of Brangelina baby


Shiloh Jolie-Pitt...... $4.1 million?

More pics, if you care.


Office slang

A few examples:

  •  Betamaxed - When a technology is overtaken in the market by inferior but better marketed competition as in “Microsoft betamaxed Apple right out of the market”
  •  CROP DUSTING - Surreptitiously farting while passing thru a cube farm, then enjoying the sounds of dismay and disgust; leads to PRAIRIE DOGGING.....
  •  Glazing - Corporate-speak for sleeping with your eyes open; a popular pastime at conferences and early-morning meetings. “Didn’t he notice that by the second session half the room was glazing?”
  •  Mouse Potato - The online generation’s answer to the couch potato.
  • Prairie Dogging - When something loud happens in a cube farm, causing heads to pop up over the walls trying to see what’s going on.
  •  Seagull Manager - A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, shits over everything and then leaves.
  •  Square-Headed Spouse - Computer
  •  Swiped Out - An ATM or credit card that has been used so much its magnetic strip is worn away.
  •  Uninstalled - Euphemism for being fired. Also: decruitment.
  •  404 - Someone who is clueless. From the Web error message, “404 Not Found,” which means the document requested couldn’t be located. “Don’t bother asking John. He’s 404.”



Bad hair day

From the Gallery of Hair Tragedy

Cathair1  Corn 

Jellyfish  Perm Spider



Weird city names

Here are a few U.S. city names:

  • Pig, Kentucky
  • Louisiana has a Start, but there's no Finish
  • Poor Uranus is the only planet in the solar system without a city. I guess it sounds bad when you say "I'm from your anus..."
  • You can find a Climax in 17 states.
  • France, England, Spain, Russia, Brazil, India, China, Korea, Italy, Turkey, Lebanon, Sudan, and Egypt are all in the United States.
  • You can go to Blue, Green, Orange, Violet, Black, White, Brown, or Pink, but not Yellow or Red.
  • Illinois may have Melody, but it sure doesn't have any Rhythm.
  • There's Weather in PA, but KY has Rain, Hail, Snow, and Ice!
  • Arkansas has both Simpson and Goldman
  • Speaking of Simpson, 33 states have a Springfield
  • You think Kansas City, Missouri is confusing? Try this loop: New York, Kentucky. Kentucky, Michigan. Michigan, Vermont. Vermont, Indiana. Indiana, Pennsylvania. Pennsylvania, Alabama. Alabama, New York.
  • Alabama has Intercourse, but Utah has a Virgin

The complete list


Women are smarter

Beautiful womanWhen Stephen found out he was going to inherit a fortune when his sickly father died, he decided he needed a woman to enjoy it with. So one evening he went to a singles bar where he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her natural beauty took his breath away. "I may look like just an ordinary man," he said as he walked up to her "but in just a week or two, my father will die, and I'll inherit 20 million dollars."

Impressed, the woman went home with him that evening and, three days later, she became his stepmother.

Women are so much smarter than men...

Thanks Brother Joe P

How to weigh yourself

Weing yourself
“I can't believe I was doing it wrong all these years. “

Thanks Phyllis

Wednesday, June 07, 2006

How was your breakfast this morning?


Thanks Phyllis

Baseball chair



Giraffe encounters

Giraffes Encounter


Make a left



The last photo I ever took

A few of the entries from The Last Photo I Ever Took contest.

Air balloon


Log truck

Thanks Brother Joe P

Monkey man

Man goes on diet of only Monkey Chow

Monkeychow1Imagine going to the grocery store only once every 6 months. Imagine paying less than a dollar per meal. Imagine never washing dishes, chopping vegetables or setting the table ever again. It sounds pretty good, doesn't it?

But can a human subsist on a constant diet of pelletized, nutritionally complete food like puppies and monkeys do? For the good of human kind, I'm about to find out. On June 3, 2006, I began my week of eating nothing but monkey chow: "a complete and balanced diet for the nutrition of primates, including the great apes."

Here’s his report for Day 4 (Yesterday)  He’s lost 4 pounds already.

Height: 5'11"
Weight: 165 lbs  
Mood: a touch manic
Poop: still regular, still smelly
Monkey-like Attributes: moderate desire to fling poop

Link to his site



Duct tapeOne day, a man came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in a very sexy nightie.  

"Tie me up," she purred, "and you can do anything you want."
So he tied her up and went golfing.

Thanks Brother Joe P

The "5-Second Rule" Rules

5 second ruleResearchers at the University of Illinois say the so-called "5-Second Rule" isn't a myth.  They say when you drop food on the floor, it's still safe to eat if you pick it up within five seconds.

That's because it takes at least that long for germs to devour dropped food. Sticky food though, will pick up bacteria faster than dry food.

Researchers say the 5-Second Rule probably only applies to tile and hardwood floors.

Food Science Professor Peter Blaschek said, "I think all bets are off when you're talking about something like carpeting. That's an entirely different story and we haven't done that study yet."

By the way, if you try getting rid of germs on your food by blowing on it or dusting it off, you're wasting your time. It doesn't work.



How to run up a wall and flip

Run up a wall

Just like in the movies.  

Here are the instructions if you dare.


Fun numbers of the Beast

Here are a few examples: 

  • 66  Number of the Downsized Beast
  • -666  Opposite of the Beast
  • 999  Number of the Australian Beast
  • 00666  Zip Code of the Beast
  •  E-mail Address of the Beast
  • Website of the Beast
  • 1-888-666-6666  Toll Free Number of the Beast
  • Formula 666  All Purpose Cleaner of the Beast
  • WD-666  Spray Lubricant of the Beast
  • Lotus 6-6-6 Spreadsheet of the Beast



The gender of nonliving things

Ziploc Bags are Male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them.

Copiers are Female, because once turned off; it takes a while to warm them up again. It's an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can wreak havoc if the wrong buttons are pushed.

A Tire is Male, because it goes bald and it's often over-inflated.

A Hot Air Balloon is Male, because, to get it to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under it, and of course, there's the hot air part.

Sponges are Female, because they're soft, squeezable and retain water.

A Web Page is Female, because it's always getting hit on.

A Subway is Male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up.

An Hourglass is Female, because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom.

A Hammer is Male, because it hasn't changed much over the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have around.

A Remote Control is Female. Ha! You thought it'd be male , didn't you? But consider this - it gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know the right buttons to push, he keeps trying!

Thanks Ronnie & Sue

Husband and wife

Fried eggs A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen.  "Careful," he said, "CAREFUL! Put in some more butter!  Oh my GOD!  You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY!  Turn them!  TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter.  Oh my GOD!  WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK! Careful ..  CAREFUL!  I said be CAREFUL!  You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never!  Turn them!  Hurry up!  Are you CRAZY?  Have you   LOST your mind?  Don't forget to salt them.  You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT!  THE SALT!" 

The wife stared at him.  "What in the world is wrong with you?  You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?" 

 The husband calmly replied, "I wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving."

Thanks Brother Joe P

A trip to the DMV

EyechartA Polish immigrant went to the DMV to apply for a driver's license.  First, of course, he had to take an eye sight test.

The optician showed him a card with the letters:

 'C Z W I X N O S T A C  Z'

 "Can you read this?" the optician asked.

 "Read it?" the Polish guy replied, "I know the guy."

Thanks Brother Joe P

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

Name that tune

I can name that tune in 4 birds.


Date night

Date Night in Wyoming