Saturday, November 03, 2007

What happens when the thermostat kicks on...

Cat1


Cat2


I saw these pictures before, but I didn’t get it until I saw it again on Miss Celania.

Always read the fine print

Bridge is out


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Young pilot

Runway lightsA young and foolish pilot wanted to sound cool on the aviation frequencies.


This was his first time approaching a field during the nighttime, and instead of making any official requests to the tower, he said, “Guess who?”


The controller switched the field lights off and replied, “Guess where!”


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I.R.S. pencil sharpener

IRS pencil sharpener


Thanks Gene

He shoots... He scores... He stinks

He shoots


From 25 Photographs Taken at the Exact Right Time 

BREAKING NEWS...

THIS JUST IN….
Diana


Who could have possible guessed this?


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Eating the inedible


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Mmmm, Bacon

Bacon lunchbox


Bacon Lunchbox.   $10.95  Get one here

Wide crevice

Crevice


From via

Brokeback Batman

Brokeback batman


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Everyone needs goals

Goals


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You Say “Taumata”...

…I Say “Taumatawhakatangihangakoauauotamateapokaiwhenuakitanatahu”…. Sure I do!


Taumata sign


That is a mouthfull!


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The 2008 Beijing logo explained

Beijing_2008_logo_explained


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Just sing-a-long

ABC song


It’ll come to ya when you sing the ABC song.


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24 inches

A Florida couple was watching a Discovery Channel special about an African black bush tribe whose men all had penises 24 inches long. When the black male reaches a certain age, a string is tied around his penis and on the other end is a weight. After a while, the weight stretches the penis to 24 inches. 

Later that evening, as the husband was getting out of the shower, his wife looked at him and said, "How about we try the African string-and-weight procedure?" The husband agreed and they tied a string and a weight to his penis. 


A few days later, the wife asked the husband, "How is our little tribal experiment coming along?" "Well, it looks like we're about half waythere," he replied. 
 
"Wow, you mean it's grown to 12 inches already?" 


 "No, but it's turned black.


Thanks Rich

Friday, November 02, 2007

Happy Friday!

Happy friday


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Penguin nation

Penguin


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Good view

Good view


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Great view

Great view


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Now you see him.... Now you don't

_hibye


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Come on Baby, Light My Fire....

… Try to set the night on fire.


Piano fire


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Got a small logo?

Then you need….


Make my Logo Bigger cream


Who knew it could be this easy?


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Speaking of logos…..


I’ve been super busy and haven’t had much time to evaluate the B&P logo submitted.  There are about ten as of now I think.  I’ll be working on that soon.  Thanks for your interest and help.

Trying to catch fish....

….that are under the ice.



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New meaning to the term - Burning a CD

Burn-cd.thumbnail


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What would happen...

On my first day working at the gas station, I watched a senior co-worker measure the level of gasoline in the underground tanks by lowering a giant measuring stick down into them.

Lit_match"What would happen if I threw a lit match into the hole?" I joked.

"It would go out," he replied very matter of factly.

"Really?" I asked, surprised to hear that. "Is there a lack of oxygen down there or some safety device that would extinguish it before the fumes ignited?"

"No," my co-worker continued. "The force from the explosion would blow out the match."


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Things you didn't want to know....


  • D uring an hour's swimming at a municipal pool you will ingest 1/12 liter of urine. (That's about 2.5 ounces)

  • In an average day your hands will have come into indirect contact with 15 penises (touching door handles, etc.)

  • An average person's yearly fast food intake will contain 12 pubic hairs.

  • In a year you will have swallowed 14 insects - while you slept!

  • Annually you will shake hands with 2 women who have recently masturbated and failed to wash their hands.

  • Annually you will shake hands with 26 men who have recently masturbated and failed to wash their hands.

  • In a lifetime 22 workmen will have examined the contents of your dirty linen basket.

  • At an average wedding reception you have a 1/100 chance of getting a cold sore from one of the guests.

  • Daily you will breath in 1 liter of other peoples' anal gases.

HAVE A GREAT DAY... ...and wash your damn hands!


Thanks Joe P

Thursday, November 01, 2007

It's Coming....

Cart


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How much of a movie freak are you?

Movie freakHere are my results:

64% Movie Freak

How about you?


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Hard Rock Mountin'

Hard rocl mountin


More erotic nature

Police call

This elderly spinster called the police. "My next door neighbor is exposing himself. Oh my," she continued, "he's just standing there, big as you please, taking a shower with his window shades up!"


The squad car arrived immediately to catch the evil culprit in the act. She led the cop into her bedroom and pointed out her window. "See what I mean, officer."


The policeman scratched his head and said, "Ma'am, I can only see the top of his head above his window sill."


The lady replied, "Crazy fool, you got to get on up on that dresser over there."


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Beer flag

God Bless America!


Beer flagBeer flag


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Vodka

Vodka


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Is that traffic cone moving?

Traffic cone


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Beary depressed

Bear suicide


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Gut Bomb explosion?

Gut bomb explosion


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Fall paw fashion

Autumn


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Mac vs PC

Mac vs pc


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Spaghetti monster

Spaghetti monster


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Patience

Patience


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Is it coming or going?

Coming or going


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Hokey-Pokey cat

Hokey pokey


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What does it feel like to die?

Find out here


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Pass the head

Seriously…. Pass the head


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Warning: Fast Car

This makes sense to me…..


Fast car


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Michael Jackson was here

MJ was here


Try this practical joke at your neighborhood department store.


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Fearless

Fearless


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Conservation

Golfer---Cartoon-Who says we're not conservation conscious?  A recent study found the average golfer walks about 900 miles a year.


Another study found golfers drink, on average, 22 gallons of beer a year.  That means, on average, golfers get about 41 miles to the gallon.


Kind Of Makes You Proud!


Thanks Gene

Funny face

Tummyeyes

Start a new day?

Startanewday


Yeah, what the heck… I’ll give it a try.


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The big bad wolf....

Bad wolfLittle Red Riding Hood is skipping down the road when she sees a big bad wolf crouched down behind a log.


"My, what big eyes you have, Mr. Wolf."


The wolf jumps up and runs away.


Further down the road Little Red Riding Hood sees the wolf again and this time he is crouched behind a bush.


"My what big ears you have, Mr. Wolf."


Again the wolf jumps up and runs away.


About two miles down the road Little Red Riding Hood sees the wolf again and this time he is crouched down behind a rock.
 
"My what big teeth you have Mr. Wolf."


With that the wolf jumps up and screams, "Will you knock it off, I'm trying to poop!"


Thanks Gene

Thorough frisking

… a little too thorough…



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Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Happy Halloween

Pumpkin butt


Max-womancostume


Mac-O-Lanterns
Macolanterns


Pumpk11


Image0033


Hahaha1


9 last minute Halloween costumes you can make from junk


Max10-28-07


Map


10 things that sound dirty on Halloween


1. So...What'd you get in the sack?


2. Once you get under the sheet, start moaning and groaning!!!


3. Just hop on that broomstick and ride it!


4. Those small suckers are gone in a few licks!


5. I got the best piece from that house.


6. Quit screwing around on the porch!!!


7. Stick your hand in and guess what you're feeling....


8. It was so filled and heavy, I had to use TWO hands!!


9. They'll suck you dry if they get their teeth in you.


10. I bobbed and bobbed, but couldn't get my mouth around it!


 


HalloweenCostume+Party-1


Cut out your own Halloween masks from Forbes


Image0099


Baseball pumpkin


Pumpkin


Image01313


Corny Pumpkin
Corny pumpkin


What kind of monster are you?


Max10-30-06.gif


Image01010


Flasher
Image01212


Angry kid


Pumpkinlove


Larry-craig-mugshot
Senator Larry Craig mugshot mask


 From all the usual suspects