Wednesday, June 27, 2007
10 ways to avoid speeding tickets
- · Drive within 5-10 mph of surrounding traffic
- · Try to stay in the middle of the pack
- · Find a "rabbit"
- · Do not change lanes frequently, tailgate or otherwise drive aggressively
- · Avoid the fast lane
- · Watch for cutouts and modulate your speed accordingly
- · Don't speed when you are the only car on the road
- · If it's OK legally, get a radar detector
- · If possible, drive a nondescript vehicle
- · Be aware that appearances count
All the deatials about these 10 tips
World's steepest runway
Courchevel Airport, Courchevel, France
Lots more on airports, runways and air traffic controllers here
Psychological card trick
A card trick created by Richard Wiseman. The first time you watch this you probably wonder how it is done. Watch it a second time and I'm sure you'll figure it out.
(I had to watch it twice to confirm what I had suspected. Still well done.)
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
Somewhere over the rainbow
I took these pics this evening from my deck overlooking the Mississippi River. It was a complete rainbow. I just couldn’t get back far enough to get it all in one shot. So here we have the left leg and the right leg of the rainbow. It looks rather “Arch-ish” in this view which is quite suitable being this is just down river from the Gateway Arch.
Gas prices
My wife wanted to go somewhere expensive for our anniversary, so I took her down the street to the Sunoco station.
I have my car towed to work because it’s cheaper than buying gas.
All in favor of conserving gasoline, please raise your right foot.
I saw a guy on the street corner, holding up a hat and a sign that said, “Wife and 2 Cars to Feed.”
For our vacation this summer, we’re thinking it will be cheaper to just mail the car.
Two blondes...
Two blondes were walking down the road and the first blonde said, "Look at that dog with one eye!"
The other blonde covers one of her eyes and says, "Where?"
List of really short books
Different Ways to Spell Bob
- The Wild Years by Al Gore
- America's Most Popular Lawyers
- The Amish Phone Directory
- Easy UNIX
- The Catholic Guide to Great Sex
- Amelia Earhart's Guide to the Pacific Ocean
- To All The Men I've Loved Before, by Ellen DeGeneres
- Spotted Owl Recipes, by the EPA
- How To Sustain A Musical Career, by Art Garfunkel
- Mike Tyson's Guide to Dating Etiquette
- Everything Men Know About Women
- Everything Women Know About Men
- Staple Your Way To Success
- Dr. Kevorkian's Collection of Motivational Speeches
- The Difference Between Reality and Dilbert
Emphasis on the word little.According to the nation's mayors, St. Louis water is the best
St. Louis bested four other finalists, chosen from an original field of more than 90 cities.
David Visintainer, the city's water commissioner, is soaking it up. “That's a pretty great honor," he said.
A limestone derivative is added to "soften" the water, Visintainer said, and a carbon process is used to wipe out pollutants. St. Louis water is odor neutral, he said, without the brownish tint that keeps water filter salesmen afloat in other big cities.
"Our water is especially clear," Visintainer said.
The honor shouldn't be a surprise. Generations of beer barons have used St. Louis water to better their brew. The award — bestowed by the U.S. Conference of Mayors — comes with a $15,000 prize and the title "Best Tasting City Water in America."
Visintainer isn't sure how the city Water Department will celebrate, but, he said, if there is a party, don't expect bottled water.
Monday, June 25, 2007
Logic
This one has been around forever, at least since I was a kid. The internet just makes it easier to spread around. … (And it still baffles me.)
Three men go into a motel. The desk clerk said the room was $30, so each man paid $10 and went to the room. A while later, the desk clerk realized the room was only $25, so he sent the bellboy to the three guys' room with $5. On the way, the bellboy couldn't figure out how to split $5 evenly between three men, so he gave each man $1 and kept the other $2 for himself.
This meant that the 3 men each paid $9 for the room, which is a total of $27. Add to that the $2 the bellboy kept and the total is $29. Where is the other dollar?
Snopes.com has the answer. After re-reading the answer several times I think it’s starting to sink in….I think.
2008 Presidential Candidate Selector
Let the internet tell you who you should vote for. Just answer 25 questions about what issues are important to you and what you would like to see in the next president.
Here are my results: Looks like I don’t agree too strongly with any of them. The best result is 58%.
Try out the 2008 Presidential Candidate Selector yourself.
Sunday, June 24, 2007
S&M
Sue and Sally meet at their 30th class reunion, and they haven't seen each other since graduation. They begin to talk and bring each other up to date. The conversation covers their husbands, their children, homes, etc. and finally gets around to their sex lives. Sue says "It's OK. We get it on every week or so but it's no big adventure, how's yours?"
Sally replies "It's just great, ever since we got into S&M."
Sue is aghast. "Really Sally, I never would have guessed that you would go for that."
"Oh, sure," says Sally, "He Snores while I Masturbate."
A letter from Grandma
Here is Grandma's most recent letter. She is eighty-eight years old and still drives her own car. She writes:
Dear Granddaughter,The other day I went up to our local Christian book store and saw a "Honk if you love Jesus" bumper sticker.I was feeling particularly sassy that day because I had just come from a thrilling choir performance, followed by a thunderous prayer meeting. So, I bought the sticker and put it on my bumper. Boy, am I glad I did, what an uplifting experience that followed.....I was stopped at a red light at a busy intersection, just lost in thought about the Lord and how good he is, and I didn't notice that the light had changed. It is a good thing someone else loves Jesus because if he hadn't honked, I'd never have noticed. I found that lots of people love Jesus! While I was sitting there, the guy behind started honking like crazy, and then he leaned out of his window and screamed, "For the love of God! Go! Go! Go! Jesus Christ, GO!" What an exuberant cheerleader he was for Jesus! Everyone started honking! I just leaned out my window and started waving and smiling at all those loving people. I even honked my horn a few times to share in the love!There must have been a man from Florida back there because I heard him yelling something about a sunny beach. I saw another guy waving in a funny way with only his middle finger stuck up in the air. I asked my young teenage grandson in the back seat what that meant. He said it was probably a Hawaiian good luck sign or something.Well, I have never met anyone from Hawaii, so I leaned out the window and gave him the good luck sign right back. My grandson burst out laughing. Why even he was enjoying this religious experience!!A couple of the people were so caught up in the joy of the moment that they got out of their cars and started walking towards me. I bet they wanted to pray or ask what church I attended, but this is when I noticed the light had changed. So, I waved at all my brothers and sisters grinning, and drove on through the intersection. I noticed that I was the only car that got through the intersection before the light changed again and felt kind of sad that I had to leave them after all the love we had shared. So I slowed the car down, leaned out the window and gave them all the Hawaiian good luck sign one last time as I drove away.Praise the Lord for such wonderful folks!! I will write again soon.Love, Grandma
Model with no navel
Creative alarm-clock carpet
Do you find it hard to get up in the morning? There’s been quite a few ingenious alarm clock concepts of late. But this one is the best ever. In order to turn it off, you have to get up and step on it. If you really want to make it a challenge, place it far away from your bed. Of course it wouldn’t be a clock if it didn’t have and LCD screen to indicate time too.
But, will it keep you from going back to bed?
Are you a computer geek?
Here are my results:
I thought I did better than that! I thought I would score better. Some of my friends think I’m a computer expert. Fools!
(The following two posts came from parts of this test)
Things you don’t want to hear from Technical Support
- "Do you have a sledgehammer or a brick handy?"
- * "That's right, not even McGyver could fix it."
- * "So -- what are you wearing?"
- * "Duuuuuude! Bummer!"
- * "Looks like you're gonna need some new dilithium crystals, Cap'n."
- * "Press 1 for Support. Press 2 if you're with 60 Minutes. Press 3 if you're with the FTC."
- * "We can fix this, but you're gonna need a butter knife, a roll of duct tape, and a car battery."
- * "In layman's terms, we call that the Hindenburg Effect."
- * "Hold on a second... Mom! Timmy's hitting me!"
- * "Okay, turn to page 523 in your copy of Dianetics."
- * "Please hold for Mr. Gates' attorney."
Software
Software doesn't just appear on the shelves by magic. That program shrink-wrapped inside the box along with the indecipherable manual and 12-paragraph disclaimer notice actually came to you by way of an elaborate path, through the most rigid quality control on the planet. Here, shared for the first time with the general public, are the inside details of the program development cycle.
- Programmer produces code he believes is bug-free.
- Product is tested. 20 bugs are found.
- Programmer fixes 10 of the bugs and explains to the testing department that the other 10 aren't really bugs.
- Testing department finds that five of the fixes didn't work and discovers 15 new bugs.
- See 3.
- See 4.
- See 5.
- See 6.
- See 7.
- See 8.
- Due to marketing pressure and an extremely pre-mature product announcement based on overly-optimistic programming schedule, the product is released.
- Users find 137 new bugs.
- Original programmer, having cashed his royalty check, is nowhere to be found.
- Newly-assembled programming team fixes almost all of the 137 bugs, but introduce 456 new ones.
- Original programmer sends underpaid testing department a postcard from Fiji. Entire testing department quits.
- Company is bought in a hostile takeover by competitor using profits from their latest release, which had 783 bugs.
- New CEO is brought in by board of directors. He hires programmer to redo program from scratch.
- Programmer produces code he believes is bug-free....
Elwood crowned World's Ugliest Dog
Elwood, dark colored and hairless — save for a mohawk-like puff of white fur on his head — is often referred to as "Yoda," or "ET," for his resemblance to those famous science fiction characters.
"I think he's the cutest thing that ever lived," said Elwood's owner, Karen Quigley, a resident of Sewell, New Jersey.
Quigley brought Elwood out to compete for the second year at the annual ugly dog contest at the Marin-Sonoma County Fair. Elwood placed second last year.
Most of the competing canines were also Chinese Crested, a breed that features a mohawk, bug eyes and a long, wagging tongue.
Quigley said she rescued Elwood two years ago. "The breeder was going to euthanize him because she thought he was too ugly to sell," said Quigley.
"So ha ha, now Elwood's all over the Internet and people love him and adore him."
Beyond the regal title of ugliest dog, Elwood also earned a $1,000 reward for his owner.
Thanks Scott
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