Saturday, June 25, 2005

Emilie's Don't Yawn Game

Play Emilie’s Don’t Yawn Game.

Can you play… and not yawn?  It’s harder than you think.

via Look at this

Why is yawning contagious?

Yawn-fox

The answer is here.  If you can understand it, please explain  it to me… in laymans terms.

via madville.com

 

Playing chicken with a Porsche.... literally

Porche

It went all the way through the interior of the car.  See the complete series of pics here.

via madville.com

This is gonna really hurt

This will hurt
Very big YELP coming up.  Look closely at this picture of two dogs playing…. then wince like I did.

Paper Jam

Paper jam

Redneck hot tub

Hot tub

I can see this coming to the Glutton Club.

Friday, June 24, 2005

A real thumb drive

Thumb drive… or finger key as they call it.  It’s a USB storage device.  Transport your files from computer to computer easily with this thumb drive.

via Look at this

Hog hearse

Hog hearse
Now you can be carried to your final rest by a Harley.  Read this for details.

via Look at this

Thursday, June 23, 2005

Waterless no flush urinal

Waterless urinal

Read all about it.

How romantic - beer can rings

Beer can ring
They’re only $30. … Made from your favorite beverage can.  Details.

via land-o-links

You light up my life... and my wall

Light dog

via ugoto

Have it your way

Anus Burger

via ugoto

Jesus and some friends

An Irishman in a wheelchair entered a restaurant one afternoon and asked the waitress for a cup of coffee. 
The Irishman looked across the restaurant and asked, "Is that Jesus sitting over there?" 

The waitress nodded "yes," so the Irishman told her to give Jesus a cup of coffee on him. 
 
The next patron to come in was an Englishman with a hunched back. He shuffled over to a booth, painfully sat down, and asked the waitress for a cup of hot tea. He also glanced across the restaurant and asked, "Is that Jesus over there?" 
 
The waitress nodded, so the Englishman said to give Jesus a cup of hot tea, "My treat. 
 
The third patron to come into the restaurant was a Redneck on crutches. He hobbled over to a booth, sat 
down and hollered, "Hey there, sweet thang! How's about gettin' me a cold glass of Coke!" He, too, looked across the restaurant and asked, "Is that God's boy over there?" The waitress once more nodded, so the Redneck said to give Jesus a cold glass of Coke, "On my bill." 
 
As Jesus got up to leave, he passed by the Irishman, touched him and said, "For your kindness, you are 
healed." The Irishman felt the strength come back into his legs, got up, and danced a jig out the door. 
 
Jesus also passed by the Englishman, touched him and said, "For your kindness, you are healed." The 
Englishman felt his back straightening up, and he raised his hands, praised the Lord and did a series of 
back flips out the door. 
 
Then Jesus walked towards the Redneck. 
 
The Redneck jumped up and yelled, "Don't touch me...I'm drawin' disability!"
 
Thanks Mary

golf anyone?

 Many years ago in Scotland, a new game was invented. It was ruled

"Gentlemen Only...Ladies Forbidden"

...and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.

UPDATE: Two headed kitten dies

Follow up to earlier story:

 ROSEBURG, Ore. - Gemini, the two-headed kitten born this month, is no more.
Owner Lee Bluetear said she didn't know what caused the death of the unusual creature, which died Thursday in the town of Glide, but she said the kitten appeared very tired and did not want to eat.

Read about it here.

Armed and dangerous

Armed and dangerous
Or, should that be armed and thonged?

Top 100 movie quotes

It’s worth looking over this list.  Use it to quiz your friends.

#1 quote:  “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn.” –  Gone with the wind.  1939

AFI’s 100 Top Movie Quotes

Wednesday, June 22, 2005

How the Starbucks logo became less naughty

Starbucks_logo_olderStarbucks_logo_new

Read all about it.

via Look at this

No one can eat just one

Big sandwich
“Want chips with that?”
World’s biggest sandwich weighs in at 6,991 lbs.

via Look at this

How long can I really keep that jar of ketchup?

Ketchup Certain items in your house practically scream 'toss me' when their prime has passed. That mysterious extra white layer on the Cheddar? A sure sign it needs to be put out of its misery. Chunky milk? Down the drain it goes.

But what about that jar of olives or Maraschino cherries that has resided in your refrigerator since before the birth of your kindergarten? Or the innumerable nonedibles lurking deep within your cabinets and closets: stockpiled shampoo and toothpaste, seldom-used silver polish? How do you know when their primes have passed?
  

 With help from experts, Real Simple has compiled a guide to expiration dates. These dates are offered as a rough guideline.

via Presurfer

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Grapefruit makes women smell 6 years younger

Grapefruit A study of smells shows that the scent of grapefruit on women make them seem about six years younger to men. However, grapefruit fragrance on men does nothing for them.

Complete story here.

via Blogywood

Why does the moon appear so big sometimes?

MoonIt’s the Moon Illusion.   It’s especially noticeable at this time of year.  Step outside any evening at sunset and look around. You'll see a giant moon rising in the east.  It looks like Earth's moon, round and cratered; the Man in the Moon is in his usual place. But something's wrong. This full moon is strangely inflated. It's huge!
find out why that is here.

via Blogywood

Subliminal Advertising

Notice anything sexual here?
Benson-4.5webO

Look here for the scoop on what’s really there.

 

Big boobs are out.... It's official

Pamela45 Big is out, it would appear - at least as far as breasts are concerned. The days of bra-busting boob jobs are coming to an end, plastic surgeons revealed yesterday.
Far fewer women now want to 'do a Jordan' and inflate their bosoms to epic proportions.

Read all about it.

What to do if you're swallowed by a whale....( this is serious)

Chances are you won’t need this information…but …. what if?……

   Advice for Swallowees

WhaleOnce inside, sit tight and try not to touch anything if at all possible. Gastric processes are invasive and skin does not recover well from encounters with digestive fluids. The process by which gastric acid handles food is slow and wearing clothing, especially of the synthetic variety, is likely to buy you some time.

Escape from the belly of a whale, aside from simple survival, may be far more difficult as the majority of whales - especially the Baleen whales that rely on sieving minuscule marine life forms for their diet - have complex digestive systems. They may have up to four stomach chambers, rather like the multi-stomach system of a cow, which allows a controlled channelling of foodstuffs through the digestive system. There is also the constant intake of seawater that results from their feeding processes. Unless someone is looking for you, or you have a very large cutting implement and a strong stomach, you may have to be satisfied with simply surviving until starvation takes you or good fortune saves the day.

If all else fails you might consider using pepper or a small fire to smoke your way out.

More info here.

via Look at this

Top 50 cleanest cities in America

Unfortunately St. Louis ranks 47th on the list.

A very freaky urinal

Freakytoilet

Freakytoiletinuse2if

It moves up and down the wall when you use it too. 
Click here to see a video of it in use.

 

Completely nuts!

Nuts
via big-boys.com

Gator mating season... Beware!

Gator season

Why wear a bra?

Giant-bra "Because breasts need to be supported?"
There is no medical reason to wear a bra.  "...wearing a bra... has no medical necessity whatsoever", says Susan M. Love, M.D in her "Dr. Susan Love's Breast Book".  Breasts were fine before the invention of brasserie.  
This is similar to the myth that women supposedly need corsets to support their stomach muscles.

I like the way this doctor lady thinks!

More bra info here.

via Bifurcated Rivets

Portable rotary cell phone

Oldcellphone

 It's a GSM cell phone built inside an old rotary phone. You pop your SIM card in, it dials out, rings and acts just like an old fashion phone, but it's now my full time cell phone.

Read all about it here.   Yuo can get your very own portable cell phone at Spark Fun for only $399.

via boing boing.

Why God made pets

Dog baby
To protect our children.   There are other reasons here.

via The Presurfer

Monday, June 20, 2005

Put on a few extra pounds? You might need a bigger casket when the time comes

Big casket
The Goliath Casket Company has been forced to make its coffins bigger.  Read all about it.

via growabrain

Two faced kitten born in Oregon

Kittenx2
 ROSEBURG, Ore. - A newborn kitten recently entered the world with two faces and, hopefully, at least nine lives.  Gemini was born Sunday with two mouths, two tongues, two noses and four eyes.
Read the story here.

via Look at this

Puppy with 6 legs...and 2 penises....

Puppy6

…was found sleeping outside a Chinese temple in a Malaysian town this week.  Here’s the story.

via look at this

Too broke for an iPod - Get yourself an iNO

Ino

via geektechnique.org

When they said the biker was on pot, I don't think this is what they meant

Moving on

Don't click it

Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Never click again.  Ok…you have to click this link…but thats the last time… maybe.  Don’t click it.

The headache

The doctor said, "Joe, the good news is I can cure your headaches. The bad new is that it will require castration.  You have a very rare condition, which causes your testicles to press on your spine and the pressure creates one hell of a headache.  The only way to relieve the pressure is to remove the testicles."
 
Joe was shocked and depressed.  He wondered if he had anything to live for.  He had no choice but to go under the knife.  When he left the hospital, he was without a headache for the first time in 20 years, but he felt like he was missing an important part of himself.  As he walked down the street, he realized that he felt like a different person.
 
He could make a new beginning and live a new life.  He saw a men's clothing store and thought, "That's what I need...  a new suit."
 
He entered the shop and told the salesman, "I'd like a new suit."
 
The elderly tailor eyed him briefly and said, "Let's see...  size 44 long." 
 
Joe laughed, "That's right, how did you know?" "Been in the business 60 years!" the tailor said.  Joe tried on the suit..  it fit perfectly. 
 
As Joe admired himself in the mirror, the salesman asked, "How about a new shirt?" Joe thought for a moment and then said, "Sure."
 
The salesman eyed Joe and said, "Let's see, 34 sleeves and 16-1/2 neck."
 
Joe was surprised, That's right, how did you know?" "Been in the business 60 years.  Joe tried on the shirt and it fit perfectly. Joe walked comfortably around the shop and the salesman asked, "How about some new underwear?" Joe thought for a moment and said, "Sure." 

The salesman said, "L et's see...  size 36."
 
Joe laughed, "Ah ha!  I got you, I've worn a size 34 since I was 18 years old." The salesman shook his head, "You can't wear a size 34.  A size 34 would press your testicles up against the base of your spine and give you one hell of a headache."
  
New suit - $400
New shirt - $36
New underwear - $6
Second Opinion - PRICELESS
 
via Mary

Sunday, June 19, 2005

How to tie a tie

Bow4Learn to tie a bow tie, an ascot, cross knot, four-in-hand, half-windsor, Prince Albert and a small knot tie. 
Complete with videos if you’re a complete klutz.   Classic tie knots.

via growabrain

Weird shoes

Shoes
Foir even weirder shoes… click here.

via growabrain

Whis is popcorn so expensive at the movies?

PopcornIt turns out that most of the money for movie tickets goes back to the studios, so the only way theaters can make money is from concession sales.  Complete story here.

 

 

 

Tomb of the unknown soldier

Tomb-19451. How many steps does the guard take during his walk across the tomb of the Unknowns and why?
21 steps. It alludes to the twenty-one gun salute, which is the highest honor given any military or foreign dignitary.

2. How long does he hesitate after his about face to begin his return walk and why?
21 seconds for the same reason as answer number 1

3. Why are his gloves wet?
His gloves are moistened to prevent his losing his grip on the rifle.

4. Does he carry his rifle on the same shoulder all the time and if not, why not?
He carries the rifle on the shoulder away from the tomb. After his march across the path, he executes an about face and moves the rifle to the outside shoulder.

5. How often are the guards changed?
Guards are changed every thirty minutes, twenty-four hours a day, 365 days a year.

6. What are the physical traits of the guard limited to?
For a person to apply for guard duty at the tomb, he must be between 5' 10" and 6' 2" tall and his waist size cannot exceed 30."
Other requirements of the Guard: They must commit 2 years of life to guard the tomb, live in a barracks under the tomb, and cannot drink any alcohol on or off duty for the rest of their lives.
They cannot swear in public for the rest of their lives and cannot disgrace the uniform {fighting} or the tomb in any way. After two years, the guard is given a wreath pin that is worn on their lapel signifying they served as guard of the tomb. There are only 400 presently worn. The guard must obey these rules for the rest of their lives or give! up the wreath pin.
The shoes are specially made with very thick soles to keep the heat and cold from their feet. There are metal heel plates that extend to the top of the shoe in order to make the loud click as they come to a halt.
There are no wrinkles, folds or lint on the uniform. Guards dress for duty in front of a full-length mirror.
The first six months of duty a guard cannot talk to anyone, nor watch TV. All off duty time is spent studying the 175 notable people laid to rest in Arlington National Cemetery. A guard must memorize who they are and where they are interred.

Among the notables are: President Taft, Joe E. Lewis {the boxer} and Medal of Honor winner Audie Murphy, {the most decorated soldier of WWII} of Hollywood fame.

Every guard spends five hours a day getting his uniforms ready for guard duty.

ETERNAL REST GRANT THEM O LORD, AND LET PERPETUAL LIGHT SHINE UPON THEM.
In 2003 as Hurricane Isabelle was approaching Washington, DC, our US Senate/House took 2 days off with anticipation of the storm. On the ABC evening news, it was reported that because of the dangers from the hurricane, the military members assigned the duty of guarding the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier were given permission to suspend the assignment. They respectfully declined the offer, "N! o way, Sir!" Soaked to the skin, marching in the pelting rain of a tropical storm, they said that guarding the Tomb was not just an assignment, it was the highest honor that can be afforded to a serviceperson. The tomb has been patrolled continuously, 24/7, since 1930. I don't usually suggest that many emails be forwarded, but I'd be very proud if this one reached as many as possible. We can be very proud of our young men and women in the service no matter where they serve. God Bless and keep them.

via Ronnie & Sue

My kind of kid

Pervert

And I thought I was having a crappy day

Birdkid

Taking a ride with Dad

Dogrider