Saturday, July 23, 2005

Turtle adopts baby hippo after Tsunami

Hippo and turtle
A baby hippopotamus, swept into the Indian Ocean by the Tsunami, is finally coming out of his shell thanks to the love of a 120–year-old tortoise.  Complete story and more pictures here.

via growabrain

Oooops

Water skiing

Cool cats.... errrrr, dogs

Cool sunglasses

Evidence of the dirty deed

Evidence

Nap time

Long legs

Next version of Windows to be called Vista

VistaNo more Windows XP.  
Longhorn will be called Vista. 
Beta released to developers August 3, 2005
No official public release date

 

From  J-walkblog.com

Hasta la vista, Longhorn. The official name for the next version of Windows is Windows Vista. Kinda rolls right off the tongue, eh? It's an exciting day, and people are dancing in the streets.

My initial thoughts:

  • Soon there will be a Web page that compares WV with VW. All of the old car vs. OS jokes will be resurrected.
  • People in West Virginia will be even more confused.
  • No one will ever be able to find the Volunteers In Service To America organization in Google.
  • The city of Vista, California, will experience rapid growth and become the new Silicon Valley. It's neighbor to the south, Chula Vista, will be jealous.
  • Microsoft will sue AltaVista.
  • Microsoft will also sue VISA because the name is just too similar.
  • This company will get a million hits today.
  • Everyone in the world (except Microsoft) will realize that Longhorn is a much cooler name.
  • Thousands of hilarious acronyms will be created, such as Very Insecure System That's Awful.

via J-walkblog

Friday, July 22, 2005

Soccer sucks

Soccer sucks

Lady and the tramp... or something like that

Lady and dog

Apparently Kim isn't doing very well

Kim sucks

Holy crap! Time to find a new parking place

Bird crap

Whatever you do, don't talk to the parrot

Parrot

Wanda's dishwasher quit working so she called a repairman.  Since she had to go to work the next day, she told the repairman, "I'll leave the key under the mat Fix the dishwasher, leave the bill on the counter, and I'll mail you a check."

“Oh, by the way don't worry about my bulldog. He won't bother you.  But, whatever you do, do NOT, under ANY circumstances, talk to my parrot!" "I REPEAT, DO NOT TALK TO MY PARROT!!!"

When the repairman arrived at Wanda's apartment the following day, he discovered the biggest, meanest looking bulldog he has ever seen.  But, just as she had said, the dog just lay there on the carpet watching the repairman go about his work.

he parrot, however, drove him nuts the whole time with his incessant yelling, cursing and name calling.  Finally the repairman couldn't contain himself any longer and yelled,  "Shut up, you stupid, ugly bird!"

To which the parrot replied, "Get him, Spike”.

Thanks Phyllis

Thursday, July 21, 2005

First place Cardinal bats are really hot

Cardinals boys

via freshpictures.com

Here fishy fishy

Fishy

via freshpictures.net

The party's over

Party's over
via Insanepictures.com

Here's a hot one for you

Sun catcher
via Madville.com

1,191 pound shark caught in Martha's Vineyard

Big shark  ``This shark could eat you!'' said Steven James, president of the Boston Big Game Fishing Club, which staged this weekend's monster shark derby on Martha's Vineyard. 
 Despite its monstrous proportions - 1,191 pounds - this toothsome tiger shark did not win the competition, however, because the captain was six minutes too late into the Oak Bluffs harbor.

via Boston Hearald via Madville.com

Condom Ads

Ten pages of interesting print ads for condoms. Here are just a few.
Sperm bang

Monica

3 some
The complete series is here. There are a hundred or so ads.

McBum

McBum
Things are a little slow all over.

checking email

Checking email

Wednesday, July 20, 2005

Cool bus

Coolbus

via Dave’s Daily

Super Towboat

Towboat06Oldie but Goodie:

Incredible series of photos of a towboat going under a flooded river bridge.  I mean really going under a flooded river bridge.

Click here to see the series.

Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water - Part II

Swimming horse

When all else fails

Fukitol

via Just Me, Myself and I

You want fries with that?

Telephone oredering can be so difficult.

Buttplug
Very simple butt humorous phone conversation.

via growabrain

Who can argue with art?

Worst tattoo

Who’s Art?

via growabrain

Linked to by the Master Blogger - J-Walk

I’m honored to have been linked to by none other than the J-Walk blog today.   He linked to my story about the Shipping a hippo.  John Walkenbach’s blog was the main influence in my decision to start a blog.  He’s a very good Excel author also, and I highly recommend his books on Excel.  He didn’t pay me to say that and probably will never read it, but I admire his work very much.   OK, enough butt kissing….
I started out very small and just a week or so ago I topped the 100 hits a day average.  If others keep linking to me I think that number of hits will skyrocket.

What I blog:

I look for anything that makes me laugh or makes me think “WOW’ or “That’s cool” or some other exclamation.  I post mainly things that I’ve not seen before, but every once in a while I’ll link to a classic.

Thanks for reading…. and feel free to leave comments on any topic you find interesting.

Bits and Pieces…… We scour the web so you don’t have to.

Tuesday, July 19, 2005

How to ship a hippo

Hippo According to the USPS ……You'll need:

  • 1,000-gallon tank per hippo
  • 1,000 gallons of water
  • Crane
  • 1-pound sedative
  • Soothing hippo music
  • 2 Aspirin (for you)

 

How to pack:

1. Fill your tank with 800 gallons of water. Start yesterday. Remember, a medium-sized hippo takes up at least 200 gallons. (Just out of curiosity, why do you have a hippo, anyway?)

2. Apply sedative. Take two Aspirin.

3. Hold it, hold it - put the hippo in the tank, first. Start with soothing hippo music, followed by a large winch and crane.

4. Now go relax in a hot bath before the forklift arrives.

 

For more tips click USPS Movers Net.

What's wrong with this picture?

Bike lock

Whoa, big fella

Whoa big fella

family reunion

Reunion

via Factum

Viagra nap

Nap at park

via Factum

When you really gotta go

Gotta go

via Factum

I love my bike, but.....

Bed bike
This guys is taking it a little too far.

Warning labels


Disposable razor Do not use this product during an earthquake.
Zantac 75  Do not take if allergic to zantac.
  
Bic Lighter  Ignite lighter away from face.
 
Dial Soap Directions: Use like regular soap. 
Little Ones Baby Lotion Keep away from children 
Bowl Fresh Safe to use around pets and children, although it is not recommended that either be permitted to drink from toilet. 
Liquid Plummer Warning: Do not reuse the bottle to store beverages. 
Sleeping Pills Warning: May cause Drowsiness   (OH NO… Say it isn’t so.)
Komatsu Floodlight  This floodlight is capable of illuminating large areas, even in the dark 
Mattress Warning: Do not attempt to swallow 
Hair Dryer Warning: Do not use while sleeping.
 
Children's Superman Costume Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly. 
American Airlines Peanuts Instructions: open packet, eat nuts. 
Chainsaw Do not attempt to stop chain with hands. 
Bag of Fritos  You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. 
Toilet brush  Do not use for personal hygiene.

The complete list is here.

You're gonna die

So am I.  And according to the Death Clock,  I’ll kick the bucket in 2022. 
Day of death
 That’s a few years away.  I can still buy green bananas. 

Monday, July 18, 2005

Jesus - He's everywhere

Jesus land
Even in Google maps.  This is in South America.

via Look at this

I'm partially blind... this is so cool

 Look around. Do you see a blind spot anywhere? Maybe the blind spot for one eye is at a different place than the blind spot for the other (this is actually true), so you don't notice it because each eye sees what the other doesn't. Close one eye and look around again. Now do you see a blind spot? Hmm. Maybe its just a little TINY blind spot, so small that you (and your brain) just ignore it. Nope, its actually a pretty BIG blind spot, as you'll see if you look at the diagram below and follow the instructions.
Blindspot
 

Close your left eye and stare at the cross mark in the diagram with your right eye. Off to the right you should be able to see the spot. Don't LOOK at it; just notice that it is there off to the right (if its not, move farther away from the computer screen; you should be able to see the dot if you're a couple of feet away). Now slowly move toward the computer screen. Keep looking at the cross mark while you move. At a particular distance (probably a foot or so), the spot will disappear (it will reappear again if you move even closer). The spot disappears because it falls on the optic nerve head, the hole in the photoreceptor sheet.

So, as you can see, you have a pretty big blind spot, at least as big as the spot in the diagram. What's particularly interesting though is that you don't SEE it. When the spot disappears you still don't SEE a hole. What you see instead is a continuous white field (remember not to LOOK at it; if you do you'll see the spot instead). What you see is something the brain is making up, since the eye isn't actually telling the brain anything at all about that particular part of the picture.

For more on this click here.

via The Presurfer

Sunday, July 17, 2005