Maturity
Women mature much faster than men. Most 17-year old females can function as adults.
Most 17-year old males are still trading baseball cards and giving each other wedgies after gym class. This is why high school romances rarely work out.
Groceries
A woman makes a list of things she needs and then goes out to the store and buys these things.
A man waits till the only items left in his fridge are half a lime and a beer. Then he goes grocery shopping. He buys everything that looks good. By the time a man reaches the checkout counter, his cart is packed tighter than the Clampett's car on Beverly Hillbillies. Of course, this will not stop him from going to the 10-items- or-fewer lane.
Going out
When a man says he is ready to go out, it means he is ready to go out.
When a woman says she is ready to go out, it means she WILL be ready to go out, as soon as she finds her earrings, finishes putting on her makeup...
Offspring
Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dental appointments and soccer games and romances and best friends and favorite foods and secret fears and hopes and dreams.
A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.
Mirrors
Men are vain; they will check themselves out in a mirror.
Women are ridiculous. They will check out their reflections in any shiny surface: mirrors, spoons, store windows, Joe Garagiola's head.
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