Top 10 things that sound dirty, but aren't....

TOP TEN THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY, BUT IN THE OFFICE, AREN'T:

10. I need to whip it out by 5.
9. Mind if I use your laptop?
8. Just stick it in my box.
7. If I have to lick one more, I'll gag!
6. I want it on my desk, NOW!!!!!
5. HMMMMM, I think it's out of fluid.
4. My equipment is so old, it takes forever to finish.
3. It's an entry-level position.
2. When do you think you'll be getting off today.

And the number 1 thing that sounds dirty but at the office isn't.
1. It's not fair. I do all the work while he just sits there!!!

TOP TEN THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY, BUT IN A LAW FIRM, AREN'T:

10. Have you looked through her briefs?
9. He is one hard judge
8. Counselor, let's do it in chambers.
7. Her attorney withdrew at the last minute.
6. Is it a penal offense?
5. Better leave the handcuffs on.
4. For $200 an hour, she better be good!
3. Can you get him to drop his suit?
2. The judge gave her the stiffest one he could.

And the number 1 thing that sounds dirty but in law isn't:
1. Think you can get me off?

TOP TEN THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY, BUT IN GOLF, AREN'T:

10. darn, my shaft is bent.
9. After 18 holes, I can barely walk
8. You really whacked the heck out of that sucker.
7. Look at the size of his putter!
6. Keep your head down and spread your legs a bit more.
5. Mind if I join your threesome?
4. Stand with your back turned and drop it.
3. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip.
2. Nice stroke, but your follow-through leaves a lot to be desired.

And the number 1 thing that sounds dirty but in golf isn't:
1. Hold up! I need to wash my balls first

Thanks Joe E