Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Kids and Science

These are supposedly answers kids gave on science quizzes.

Q: Name the  four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

Q: Explain  one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
A:  Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants  like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.

Q: How is dew  formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them  perspire.

Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?    
A: Keep it in the cow.

Q: What  causes the tides in the oceans?
A: The tides are a fight between the  Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because  there is no water on the moon, and nature hates a vacuum. I forget where  the sun joins in this fight.

Q: What are steroids?
A: Things for  keeping carpets still on the stairs.

Q: What happens to your body  as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you  get intercontinental.

Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches  puberty?
A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.

Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A:  Premature death.

Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized?  (e.g., abdomen.)
A: The body is consisted into three parts - the  brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium co ntains the  brain; the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A, E, I, O, and U.

Q: What is the  fibula?
A: A small lie.

Q: What does "varicose" mean?
A: Nearby.

Q: Give the meaning of the term  "Caesarean Section"
A: The Caesarean Section is a district in Rome

Q: What does the word "benign" mean?'
A: Benign is what you  will be after you be eight.

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