A cowboy walks into a bar and two steps in, and then he realizes it's a gay bar "What the heck," he says to himself, "I really want a drink."
When the gay waiter approaches, he says to the cowboy, "What's the name of your willy?" The cowboy says, "Look, I'm not into any of that. All I want is a drink."
The gay waiter says, "I'm sorry but I can't serve you until you tell me the name of your willy. Mine for instance is called NIKE, for the slogan ' Just Do It.'
That guy down at the end of the bar calls his SNICKERS, because 'It really Satisfies.' "
The cowboy looks dumbfounded, so the bartender tells him he will give him a second to think it over.
So the cowboy asks the man sitting to his left! who is sipping on a beer, Hey bud, what's the name of yours?"
The man looks back and says with a smile, "TIMEX." The thirsty cowboy asks, Why Timex?" the man proudly replies, " 'Cause it takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin!' "
A little shaken, the cowboy turns to two fella's on his right, who happen to be sharing a fruity Margarita and says, "So, what do you guys call yours?"
The first man turns to him and proudly exclaims, "FORD, because "Quality is Job One" "Then he adds, "Have you driven a Ford lately?"
The guy next to him then says, "I call mine CHEVY.....Like a Rock!" And gives a wink!
Even more shaken, the Cowboy has to think for a moment before he comes up with a name for his manhood.
Finally, he turns to the bartender and exclaims, "The name of my willy is SECRET. Now give me a beer."
The bartender begins to pour the cowboy a beer, but with a puzzled look asks "Why Secret?"
The cowboy says, "Because it's ' STRONG ENOUGH FOR A MAN, BUT MADE FOR A WOMAN!!!!!!
Thanks Mary
A first grade teacher in Northern Illinois explains to her class that


How do magicians do it?
It's not often a new mom delivers a 14-pound baby. It's even harder to fathom when the child is born a month premature. But not-so-little Olivia Patrick-Womack of Manteca California is living proof that not all good things come in small packages.
A different way to ask her to marry you. 

FORT MYERS, Fla. - An elderly woman, who was bitten by an alligator while working in her backyard, beat back the reptile with a garden hose.

Some people gaze into their navel for inspiration: I look into mine and see navel fluff. Also known as navel lint, it is that fascinating fluffy substance that forms mysteriously in the belly buttons of special people.
