Sunday, September 10, 2006
Take me back to the 60's
Definitely worth a look if you were around then. Even if you weren’t.
Very well made.
A blondes diary
MONDAY:
It's fun to cook for Tom. Today I made angel food cake. The recipe said beat 12 eggs separately. The neighbors were nice enough to loan me some extra bowls.
TUESDAY:
Tom wanted fruit salad for supper. The recipe said serve without dressing.
So I didn't dress. What a surprise when Tom brought a friend home for supper.
WEDNESDAY:
A good day for rice. The recipe said wash thoroughly before steaming the rice. It seemed kind of silly but I took a bath anyway. I can't say it improved the rice any.
THURSDAY:
Today Tom asked for salad again. I tried a new recipe. It said prepare ingredients, lay on a bed of lettuce one hour before serving. Tom asked me why I was rolling around in the garden.
FRIDAY:
I found an easy recipe for cookies. It said put the ingredients in a bowl and beat it. There must have been something wrong with this recipe. When I got back, everything was the same as when I left.
SATURDAY:
Tom did the shopping today and brought home a chicken. He asked me to dress it for Sunday (oh boy).For some reason Tom keeps counting to ten.
SUNDAY:
Tom's folks came to dinner. I wanted to serve roast but all I had was hamburger. Suddenly I had a flash of genius. I put the hamburger in the oven and set the controls for roast. It still came out hamburger,much to my disappointment.
GOOD NIGHT DEAR DIARY.
This has been a very exciting week. I am eager for tomorrow to come so I can try out a new recipe on Tom. If I can talk Tom into buying a bigger oven, I would like to surprise him with chocolate moose.
Thanks Phyllis
Saturday, September 09, 2006
Flying home today
Here’s the pilot on my flight home.
I’m sitting in Tampa International Airport waiting for my flight home. They have free wireless internet access, so I have something to while I kill some time. I wasn’t able to get online while in Port Charlotte.
I’m trying to get caught up on email and Bits & Pieces posting while I wait.
Should be back to normal…. at least for a week or so…then it’s off on a motorcycle trek to Branson MO for a few days. No rest for the wicked!
Sheep in a Snake
No, it’s not another Samuel Jackson bad movie…. it’s real.
This barely recognizable snake bit off more than it could chew when it snacked a pregnant ewe.
How it all began....
In ancient Israel, it came to pass that a trader by the name of
Abraham Com, did take unto himself a young wife by the name of Dot.
And Dot Com was a comely woman, broad of shoulder and long of
leg. Indeed, she had been called Amazon Dot Com.
She said unto Abraham, her husband, "Why doth thou travel far
from town to town with thy goods when thou can trade without ever
leaving thy tent?"
And Abraham did look at her as though she were several saddle
bags short of a camel load, but simply said, "How, Dear?"
And Dot replied, "I will place drums in all the towns and drums
in between to send messages saying what you have for sale and they
will reply telling you which hath the best price. And the sale can be
made on the drums and delivery made by Uriah's Pony Stable (UPS)."
Abraham thought long and decided he would let Dot have her way
with the drums. The drums rang out and were an immediate success.
Abraham sold all the goods he had at the top price, without ever
moving from his tent. But this success did arouse envy.
A man named Maccabia did secret himself inside Abraham's drum
and was accused of insider trading. And the young man did take to Dot
Com's trading as doth the greedy horsefly take to camel dung. They
were called Nomadic Ecclesiastical Rich Dominican Siderites, or NERDS
for short.
And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new riches and
the deafening sound of drums, that no one noticed that the real
riches were going to the drum maker, one Brother William of Gates,
who bought up every drum company in the land. And indeed did insist
on making drums that would work only with Brother Gates' drumheads
and drumsticks.
Dot did say, "Oh, Abraham, what we have started is being taken
over by others."
And as Abraham looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel, or as it came
to be known "eBay" he said, "we need a name that reflects what we
are," and Dot replied, "Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner Operators."
"YAHOO", said Abraham. And that is how it all began.
It wasn't Al Gore after all.
E.D.K.T.M.
A man at the hospital is starting to get very nervous after having waited, alone, in a hospital room, for three hours. Finally the sound of keys at the door. He calls out nervously: "What is wrong?"
"Mr Smith, we are sorry for the delay, but it took us a while to figure out what was wrong with you."
"And what is wrong with me?"
"You have E.D.K.T.M."
Smith pauses. "What is that?"
"Every Disease Known To Man."
Mr Smith is shocked to say the least: "Uh -- w-w-w-w-w-what can be done about that?"
"Well, we are starting you on a diet of pancakes and pizza."
"How on earth can that save me?"
"It can't, but it is the only food we can slide under the door."
Steve Irwin quotes
"Crikey means gee whiz, wow!"
"When I see what's happened all over the world, they're looking at me as this very popular, wildlife warrior, Australian bloke. And yet back here in my own country some people find me a little bit embarrassing."
"Crikey, mate. You're far safer dealing with crocodiles and western diamondback rattlesnakes than the executives and the producers and all those sharks in the big MGM building."
"I bled a lot. I got hit across the face. We couldn't film for seven days. I got whacked, underwater, across the face. I finished the shot, got into the boat and blood started coming out."
"I get called an adrenaline junkie every other minute, and I'm fine with that."
"I have no fear of losing my life. If I have to save a koala or a crocodile or a kangaroo or a snake, mate, I will save it."
"I would never blame an animal if it bit me, because I'm at fault, not them. I heal so quickly. If you cut my arm off I would grow a new one."
"I'm high as a kite, mate. I'm flat out like a lizard drinking, all the time. You know I have trouble just sitting here. You know, I'm just like, got to get up."
Beauty
A man was just waking up from anesthesia after surgery, and his wife was sitting by his side. His eyes fluttered open and he said, "You're beautiful.
Then he fell asleep again. His wife had never heard him say that, so she stayed by his side.
A few minutes later, his eyes fluttered open and he said, "You're cute!"
The wife was disappointed because instead of "beautiful," it was now "cute."
She said, "What happened to 'beautiful'?"
The man replied, "The drugs are wearing off."
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