Thursday, August 24, 2006

Doctors slang

Here are a few examples from the list of anagrams and slang used in the medical industry in the U.S. and the U.K.:

  • 3H enema - Enema that is "high, hot, and a hell of a lot." Reputedly given to patients who give staff a hard time.
  •  10th Floor Transfer - dying (floor number is always the next number on from the highest floor in the hospital).
  •  (Acute Lead Poisoning) Air-conditioned - Multiple gun shot wounds
  •  ALS - Absolute Loss of Sanity (nutcase)
  •  AQR - Ain't Quite Right
  •  AST - Assuming Seasonal Temperature (dead)
  •  BMW - Bitch Moan & Whine
  •  Bugs in the rug - pubic lice
  •  Bury the Hatchet - accidently leave a surgical instrument inside a patient.
  •  Chocolate Hostage - constipated
  •  CRAFT - Can’t Remember A F*cking Thing
  • Eating In - Intravenous feeding
  •  FTD - Fixing To Die
  •  God's Waiting Room - intensive care unit and/or geriatric unit
  •  Hi 5 - HIV positive ("V" being Roman for 5)
  •  Incarceritis - becoming dubiously ill when arrested or in court
  •  Negative Wallet Biopsy - (US) patient transferred to cheaper hospital because s/he has no insurance/funds
  •  OB/GYN - actually means Obstetric/Gynaecology, rumoured to mean "Oh Boy-Got You Naked"
  •  OPD - Obnoxious Personality Disorder
  •  Pumpkin Positive - a penlight shone into the patient's mouth/ear would encounter a brain so small that the whole head would light up
  •  Rule of Five - if more than five of the patient's orifices are obscured by tubing, he has no chance
  •  Stream team - urology dept

The complte list


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