Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Computers - Male or Female?

Reasons to believe computers are female:

  1. No one but the Creator understands their internal logic.

  2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.

  3. The message "Bad command or file name" is about as informative as, "If you don't know why I'm mad at you, then I'm certainly not going to tell you".

  4. Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later retrieval.

  5. Picky, picky, picky.

  6. They hear what you say, but not what you mean.

  7. Beauty is only shell deep.

  8. When you ask what's wrong, they say "nothing"

  9. Can produce incorrect results with alarming speed.

  10. Always turning simple statements into big productions.

  11. Smalltalk is important.

  12. You do the same thing for years, and suddenly it's wrong.

  13. They make you take the garbage out.

  14. Miss a period and they go wild!!!

  15. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

Reasons to believe computers are male:

  1. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they are the problem.

  2. A better model is always just around the corner.

  3. They look nice and shiny until you bring them home.

  4. It is always necessary to have a backup.

  5. As soon as you commit to one you realize that, if you had waited a little longer, you could have obtained a better model.

  6. The best part of having either one is the games you can play.

  7. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.

  8. Big power surges knock them out for the rest of the night.

  9. They'll do whatever you say if you push the right buttons.

  10. They have a lot of data, but are still clueless.

  11. Size does matter!


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